Need yall help (Moms giving up)

nawlinsn931

Rising Star
BGOL Investor
:crymeariver:I had to basically talk my mom off the ledge this morning
And the only reason I’m sharing is because I know many of yall have dealt with the same
I haven’t seen her since I came home and it’s hurting us both (she’s in TX)
But today she called crying because she can’t drive anymore and she feels like her life is slipping away (memory loss as well) I told her I’ll pay for her to fly up here but she has to get approved to fly by her physician because of knee surgeries
Besides FaceTime everyday what else can I do for my mom
In my mind she’s still young and I know if I lose my mom I’m on full crash out and there’s nothing that can be done. I just had to talk my oldest son out of killing himself again this weekend
 
@nawlinsn931


Any way you can contact anyone close to her in her area to check in with her? Or send her contact information for helpful resources in her area.


My dad's aunt in Seattle was dealing with MS and dementia in the 2000s. He knew about the MS, but she was mobile / functioning despite living alone. When he visited her and realized she wasn't doing well (dementia-wise), he notified her neighbors to keep an eye out for her, and also called her sister and nieces in Olympia, WA a few hours away to start looking into potentially relocating her to Olympia ASAP. They really stepped up for her and were able to assist in selling her home and getting her to their area and a care facility located within 10 minutes of their homes. They were able to visit with her on a nearly daily basis for years.
 
@nawlinsn931


Any way you can contact anyone close to her in her area to check in with her? Or send her contact information for helpful resources in her area.


My dad's aunt in Seattle was dealing with MS and dementia in the 2000s. He knew about the MS, but she was mobile / functioning despite living alone. When he visited her and realized she wasn't doing well (dementia-wise), he notified her neighbors to keep an eye out for her, and also called her sister and nieces in Olympia, WA a few hours away to start looking into potentially relocating her to Olympia ASAP. They really stepped up for her and were able to assist in selling her home and getting her to their area and a care facility located within 10 minutes of their homes. They were able to visit with her on a nearly daily basis for years.
She’s weigh my little sister but that’s a lot on my sister because she battles anxiety
I’m totally against putting her in a home
 
Most importantly praying for your mother. @nawlinsn931

You should look into getting her an aide a few days a week to keep her company, watch her and help with the light housework and medication and doctors visits. You gonna need to find a social worker and with this asshat in office a lot of services like that getting cut. But you should look into it
.
That's a lot on both you and your sister. Continue to love and support each other. And remember its tough for EVERYONE.

You SHOULD look into assisted living bro. Because if she hurts herself because of the dementia or failing health you both will never forgive yourself. I'm not saying to do it NOW. But you guys have to SERIOUSLY consider the option. Now.

It's what is best for her FIRST. Not just what is easiest.

Hope you all can work this out. I think you will all manage, if you work together.

Prayers to your son too. He definitely should get some professional help.

Bro you have make sure to take care of your own mental too.

Peace.
 
I recently lost my mom. I had planned to bring her to Virginia from NY but her health went down so quickly, my brother and I decided to have her hospitalized. She was incontinent, could no longer walk. She would sit at the edge of the bed with her head in her hands as I'm sure she was in great pain. She was terminal with kidney failure. She lasted about a month before she died. I felt my mom had given up. She lost her husband, sister and a lot of her friends. She was extremely lonely. She basically just had my brother and I and I live in VA.

If you have to, fly to Texas and rent a car and drive her back to where you live.
 
I recently lost my mom. I had planned to bring her to Virginia from NY but her health went down so quickly, my brother and I decided to have her hospitalized. She was incontinent, could no longer walk. She would sit at the edge of the bed with her head in her hands as I'm sure she was in great pain. She was terminal with kidney failure. She lasted about a month before she died. I felt my mom had given up. She lost her husband, sister and a lot of her friends. She was extremely lonely. She basically just had my brother and I and I live in VA.

If you have to, fly to Texas and rent a car and drive her back to where you live.

Condolences bro.
 
Been thinking about this myself since my parents are in their 70's The most important thing your mom needs is you. You got to figure out how to bring her closer to you or you closer to her. As we get old we have to appreciate the moments we have with our loved ones. It's way more important than money or a career. Our parent's took care of us when we couldn't take care of ourselves it's only right we do the same.
 
Man! Im going through some serious shit with my mom right now too. Dementia has kicked in and my sibling is ghost. This shit is a LOT!
Make sure that you keep someone to talk to and express your feelings. Don't keep it in. Its unhealthy.
Good luck to you, your mom, and your son.
 
I recently lost my mom. I had planned to bring her to Virginia from NY but her health went down so quickly, my brother and I decided to have her hospitalized. She was incontinent, could no longer walk. She would sit at the edge of the bed with her head in her hands as I'm sure she was in great pain. She was terminal with kidney failure. She lasted about a month before she died. I felt my mom had given up. She lost her husband, sister and a lot of her friends. She was extremely lonely. She basically just had my brother and I and I live in VA.

If you have to, fly to Texas and rent a car and drive her back to where you live.
My Condolences to you and your family, and I can relate to your situation.
 
:crymeariver:I had to basically talk my mom off the ledge this morning
And the only reason I’m sharing is because I know many of yall have dealt with the same
I haven’t seen her since I came home and it’s hurting us both (she’s in TX)
But today she called crying because she can’t drive anymore and she feels like her life is slipping away (memory loss as well) I told her I’ll pay for her to fly up here but she has to get approved to fly by her physician because of knee surgeries
Besides FaceTime everyday what else can I do for my mom
In my mind she’s still young and I know if I lose my mom I’m on full crash out and there’s nothing that can be done. I just had to talk my oldest son out of killing himself again this weekend

Sad to hear.

But it’s part of the cycle of life that we don’t want to think about when dealing with our parents as they age.

When parents health gets to that point of complete deterioration, it’s hard to get them out of the mindset to think positive.

Best to get the whole family involved, it’s too much mentally to try to handle it yourself.

Professional help could assist, but with what this shit head is doing in his administration in regards to healthcare in this country, it’s best now to be pro-active and get a head start on how to handle her long term care before the system gets overwhelmed.

Keep us updated…
 
Maybe your proby will allow you to travel for a special circumstance. My mom was 92!! Still I thought I would have her forever. I've never seen or experienced such a fast decline! Figure out a way to get your mom. Prayerfully she will get that clearance. I miss my mom and think about her every day. She did so much for my brother and I. I pray to see her in my dreams!

Find a way to get your mother!! Please!
 
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