Ladies: This is a little tamer (cleaner)than I would say normally to my friends-but it is still a good article/read. Number 3 is great advice
Your lover can not please you if you can not please you. Many people grew up learning masturbation was naughty or dirty and as a result have never done it. I assure you, its not dirty and you will not go blind. Masturbation is a helpful tool as it allows you to become completely comfortable with your body, while cluing you in to your sexual preferences. Perhaps a light graze across your collarbone sends electric volts to your clitoris and resonates throughout your body. Maybe you like to have a finger inserted while another finger grazes and teases your perineum (which is chalk full of nerve endings). It is also during this exploration that you would have become intimately acquainted with your G-spot. If you've never heard about it or have never found it I command each of you to look for it tonight.
You can find it by inserting your finger (middle finger is probably the easiest) about 3 inches in your vagina. The G-spot is located directly behind the mons pubis which places it on the anterior or top wall of the vagina so if you move your finger in a "come here" motion you should feel a soft sturdy mound. It has a ridge like texture differentiating it from the soft, plushy surrounding vaginal walls. You know you've found it when you have the urge to urinate (it is also known as the urethral sponge). If you stimulate your G-spot to the point of climax, you will probably feel a small gush of fluid and although you may have felt the urge to urinate, it is not urine, it is female ejaculate.
2. Communicate:
You've explored your body, you know what you like and he's not getting it. In your mind you're screaming for him to move over to the left, to the left, but the words never escaped your lips. Why? Sex is not for the benefit of one person. Rather, it is a mutual experience where both people involved gratify each other's sexual desires. He's not the mentalist, so he has no clue he's doing it wrong. Speak up. Tell him that you like it when he sucks on your clitoris or rather than assuming the missionary position, you'd like to reverse straddle him. If it hurts (not the good hurt), tell him to slow down or take it easy, you'll never be comfortable during sex if your body clenches up or you feel anxious before he penetrates. Trust me he won't be turned off. Well don't trust me, trust him:
"I like the uninhibited. If she can tell me what she wants, and I provide. I don't have to worry about whether she's being satisfied or not."
3. Have Confidence:
You know how people work out in water because its a weightless environment? Now matter how much you way you can get in the water and work out with burdening your heart or joints. Think of sex as your weightless environment. For the 3 hours (what?), okay for however long you're engaged in sexual activity, you have no flaws. He does not care about those 15 lbs you gained, those stretch marks, the fact you missed your pedicure appointment (though this will come up postcoitally), or your unibrow; he cares about pleasing you, caressing you and forcing your sensory system into overdrive by pushing you over the edge multiple times. All of your flaws are personal insecurities that he is oblivious to, and your constant mention of it or obvious anxiety only turn him off. Rather than think about your flaws, play up your positives. Have great legs, throw on some killer pumps, boy shorts, sashay over to him, and wrap your legs around his waist/face. I guarantee you he won't notice any of your problem areas. You are your own worse enemy in this area. This also includes being nervous about experience. Don't be afraid if you believe yourself to be inexperienced. If you're willing to learn, he's more than willing to teach.
Between The Sheets: Three Keys To Maximizing Your Pleasure
By Jasmine Anderson:
1. Know yourself.By Jasmine Anderson:
Your lover can not please you if you can not please you. Many people grew up learning masturbation was naughty or dirty and as a result have never done it. I assure you, its not dirty and you will not go blind. Masturbation is a helpful tool as it allows you to become completely comfortable with your body, while cluing you in to your sexual preferences. Perhaps a light graze across your collarbone sends electric volts to your clitoris and resonates throughout your body. Maybe you like to have a finger inserted while another finger grazes and teases your perineum (which is chalk full of nerve endings). It is also during this exploration that you would have become intimately acquainted with your G-spot. If you've never heard about it or have never found it I command each of you to look for it tonight.
You can find it by inserting your finger (middle finger is probably the easiest) about 3 inches in your vagina. The G-spot is located directly behind the mons pubis which places it on the anterior or top wall of the vagina so if you move your finger in a "come here" motion you should feel a soft sturdy mound. It has a ridge like texture differentiating it from the soft, plushy surrounding vaginal walls. You know you've found it when you have the urge to urinate (it is also known as the urethral sponge). If you stimulate your G-spot to the point of climax, you will probably feel a small gush of fluid and although you may have felt the urge to urinate, it is not urine, it is female ejaculate.
2. Communicate:
You've explored your body, you know what you like and he's not getting it. In your mind you're screaming for him to move over to the left, to the left, but the words never escaped your lips. Why? Sex is not for the benefit of one person. Rather, it is a mutual experience where both people involved gratify each other's sexual desires. He's not the mentalist, so he has no clue he's doing it wrong. Speak up. Tell him that you like it when he sucks on your clitoris or rather than assuming the missionary position, you'd like to reverse straddle him. If it hurts (not the good hurt), tell him to slow down or take it easy, you'll never be comfortable during sex if your body clenches up or you feel anxious before he penetrates. Trust me he won't be turned off. Well don't trust me, trust him:
"I like the uninhibited. If she can tell me what she wants, and I provide. I don't have to worry about whether she's being satisfied or not."
3. Have Confidence:
You know how people work out in water because its a weightless environment? Now matter how much you way you can get in the water and work out with burdening your heart or joints. Think of sex as your weightless environment. For the 3 hours (what?), okay for however long you're engaged in sexual activity, you have no flaws. He does not care about those 15 lbs you gained, those stretch marks, the fact you missed your pedicure appointment (though this will come up postcoitally), or your unibrow; he cares about pleasing you, caressing you and forcing your sensory system into overdrive by pushing you over the edge multiple times. All of your flaws are personal insecurities that he is oblivious to, and your constant mention of it or obvious anxiety only turn him off. Rather than think about your flaws, play up your positives. Have great legs, throw on some killer pumps, boy shorts, sashay over to him, and wrap your legs around his waist/face. I guarantee you he won't notice any of your problem areas. You are your own worse enemy in this area. This also includes being nervous about experience. Don't be afraid if you believe yourself to be inexperienced. If you're willing to learn, he's more than willing to teach.
I sometimes forget after a certain age some women just can't hang. 