Damn, never know what's under the clothing!!!
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My friend, Charlie drives for Uber and shares a lot of wild stories about some of his passengers. Last night he picks up 4 women in Long Island who all live in Manhattan. He drops off 3, and the last one lives way up in Inwood. She starts asking him if he thinks she's pretty because her friends always seem to get more attention. He tells her she's cute and that maybe she could dress more seductive when she goes out.
She says: "You mean like this?"
She says: "You mean like this?"
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I’m cleaning her asshole like a warm baby wipe!
Ashley Alban is the shit!
My nephew, who is in his mid 20s has a bit of a problem. He lives in a nice high rise apartment in downtown Jersey City, and his next door neighbor is driving him crazy. You see Ms. Meringue is divorced with 2 beautiful daughters that go away to college. Ms. Meringue sometimes comes over just to talk with my nephew which is kool, but my nephew wants to have sex with her in the worst way. She can sense it and always flirts with him, and then one day she told him that she would give him some, but she doesn't think he could handle it. Then she does this...
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need a csi!
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Why, Why, Why did you have to request a CSI, and make me find this (I'm just kidding, you did me a favor, but I had no idea she was built like this)!
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You're in a long distance relationship and you plan on spending the week with your girl (she lives in Washington D.C., and you're in New York City).
Unbenounced to you she has invited her best friend from college to visit while you're there also (her slick way of having her friend see what type of person you are).
Your girl has to work part of the week, so you and Jazmen will be alone in the house while she is at work. Jazmen seems nice, heavy into physical fitness and appears to be a free spirit.
Things are going well, but start to get strange after Marla (my girl) leaves for work.
I get up to see Marla off to work, and Jazmen is up too and working out.
I go back to sleep, and tell Jazmen I'll probably be up around noon, but if she needs something just knock on the door and wake me up. She says, Ok, and laughs since she is probably going to get some more rest after working out. So, I get up, clean up, get dressed and decide to walk to the store. I tap on Jazmen's door to see if she wants anything and she tells me to come in. I walk in the bedroom and she is laying down watching television and then does this.
She asked me to get her half gallon of Orange juice and some Vitamin water, so I go ok (pretending like she didn't just flash me). I do a little shopping and then tap on the door to tell Jazmen I'm back with her things. She asked me if I could bring her the water, I get it and then tap again and she tells me to come in. This time she's up, but stretching in the bed.
I don't know if this is a test or does Jazmen want to get "smashed," but Marla will be home around 6 PM, so I have a few hours to go. I have to pretend that this is not happening and put the water down and leave the room. After I check my email, I simply grab some Chinese food from last night and ask Jazmen to join me. We talk and everything seems normal (Marla home at 6) and we all go out to the park for a few hours.
Tuesday
I see Marla off to work again and Jazmen gets in her morning workout again (like clockwork). However, this time she taps on the door around 1:00 PM, and explains to me how her legs cramp up and her lower back bothers her also. I suggested that she might include more stretching with her lower legs (Why, did I do that). She closes her door and goes back in the bedroom, and then I hear her crying out in pain, so I run to the door and tap and she says "come in." When I enter the room, I asked her was she Ok, and she is laying on the floor, butt naked, and tells me she's alright, but
her leg cramped up a bit at first. Then she continues to stretch and this is what I am looking at.
Then she jumps up from the floor and said that maybe if she stretched in the bed it would put less pressure on her back (I'm confused at this point and not sure what to do. Oh, I forgot to mention that Jazmen used to dance with Alvin Ailey and is a trained ballerina).
Unbenounced to you she has invited her best friend from college to visit while you're there also (her slick way of having her friend see what type of person you are).
Your girl has to work part of the week, so you and Jazmen will be alone in the house while she is at work. Jazmen seems nice, heavy into physical fitness and appears to be a free spirit.
Things are going well, but start to get strange after Marla (my girl) leaves for work.
I get up to see Marla off to work, and Jazmen is up too and working out.
I go back to sleep, and tell Jazmen I'll probably be up around noon, but if she needs something just knock on the door and wake me up. She says, Ok, and laughs since she is probably going to get some more rest after working out. So, I get up, clean up, get dressed and decide to walk to the store. I tap on Jazmen's door to see if she wants anything and she tells me to come in. I walk in the bedroom and she is laying down watching television and then does this.
She asked me to get her half gallon of Orange juice and some Vitamin water, so I go ok (pretending like she didn't just flash me). I do a little shopping and then tap on the door to tell Jazmen I'm back with her things. She asked me if I could bring her the water, I get it and then tap again and she tells me to come in. This time she's up, but stretching in the bed.
I don't know if this is a test or does Jazmen want to get "smashed," but Marla will be home around 6 PM, so I have a few hours to go. I have to pretend that this is not happening and put the water down and leave the room. After I check my email, I simply grab some Chinese food from last night and ask Jazmen to join me. We talk and everything seems normal (Marla home at 6) and we all go out to the park for a few hours.
Tuesday
I see Marla off to work again and Jazmen gets in her morning workout again (like clockwork). However, this time she taps on the door around 1:00 PM, and explains to me how her legs cramp up and her lower back bothers her also. I suggested that she might include more stretching with her lower legs (Why, did I do that). She closes her door and goes back in the bedroom, and then I hear her crying out in pain, so I run to the door and tap and she says "come in." When I enter the room, I asked her was she Ok, and she is laying on the floor, butt naked, and tells me she's alright, but
her leg cramped up a bit at first. Then she continues to stretch and this is what I am looking at.
Then she jumps up from the floor and said that maybe if she stretched in the bed it would put less pressure on her back (I'm confused at this point and not sure what to do. Oh, I forgot to mention that Jazmen used to dance with Alvin Ailey and is a trained ballerina).
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