The Death of Relationships - Grown Folks Topic
- Thread starter doe moe
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A lot of truth with what he is saying, but all relationships develop based on how they start.
A lot of simps raised these average broads expectation levels so high, coupled with them constantly getting gassed up on social media.
A lot of simps raised these average broads expectation levels so high, coupled with them constantly getting gassed up on social media.
I don’t know where to start off the conversation.
Speak your mind, bruh
Well, I agree with some things he said. I think he made some good points. However, when a person is just talking for 15 minutes straight, his opinion is asserted without objection. Since I’m not sure about his content, he sounds male biased, so I’m guessing that’s his biggest demographic. So it would make sense that he speak the way he does.
I think too much emphasis was placed on what the woman ISN’T doing versus what the man IS doing when it comes to the ending of relationships. So some of his generalizations where way off base. For example what he said at 2:30 and onward until his title theme.
But to some of his points about sex not being about to be used as leverage and he said that isn’t the case anymore, I have to disagree with that. Just because sex is more accessible doesn’t mean that women can’t use it as leverage like they use to be. The power of pussy will always be leverage for women until the end of time.
I do agree with women becoming breadwinners is a good point, but now they are now able to gain control in multiple areas. Women are becoming more self-reliant, which is not a bad thing. The man would have have multiple ego checks with a woman breadwinner, especially if they were raised by a traditional father.
These are just some points I agreed and disagreed with.
This nigga contradicts himself.
He’s of the “man is leader of woman.” Mindset, thinking society will reset itself to accomplish meaningful relationships this way.
Nothing wrong with women being bread winners. If she’s not winning bread in some way or another she is a liability.
Some niggas just dont want to pick up the household duties at all and want to relegate it to a gender role lol But if your woman is making more money than you and taking care of business go wash the dishes, make a meal and shit. What happened to team work? Oh its only team work when you get to do what you want to do.
My wife is not my mother she is my lover. I dont expect her to be my mommy I had one of those already.!
And to his point about women being accessories in relationships. That’s these simp ass niggas fault not the women. The women are going to cash in on any benefits these simps are giving them. When dudes start choosing women who bring more to the table than a phat ass and good pussy they’ll be doing better. Stop rewarding medicority because you thirsten for pussy witcha thirsty ass.
He trying to put men back in the same trap that’s been hurting us. Things aren’t going backwards, we have to adapt and find new ways. He’s right about men have been consistently traditional despite women earning as much as men and more.
Relationships arent dying because of this but traditional relationships are. That’s what he’s upset about.
He’s of the “man is leader of woman.” Mindset, thinking society will reset itself to accomplish meaningful relationships this way.
Nothing wrong with women being bread winners. If she’s not winning bread in some way or another she is a liability.
Some niggas just dont want to pick up the household duties at all and want to relegate it to a gender role lol But if your woman is making more money than you and taking care of business go wash the dishes, make a meal and shit. What happened to team work? Oh its only team work when you get to do what you want to do.
My wife is not my mother she is my lover. I dont expect her to be my mommy I had one of those already.!
And to his point about women being accessories in relationships. That’s these simp ass niggas fault not the women. The women are going to cash in on any benefits these simps are giving them. When dudes start choosing women who bring more to the table than a phat ass and good pussy they’ll be doing better. Stop rewarding medicority because you thirsten for pussy witcha thirsty ass.
He trying to put men back in the same trap that’s been hurting us. Things aren’t going backwards, we have to adapt and find new ways. He’s right about men have been consistently traditional despite women earning as much as men and more.
Relationships arent dying because of this but traditional relationships are. That’s what he’s upset about.
Sex is definitely a weapon and will always be as long as these simps are able to be taken advantage of.
This is what I have questions about when it comes to purchases in a relationship..like how does it make you feel if a woman tells you as a man.."well i make more money than you so i can buy whatever I want"...i guess you should be able to see this before you get into a serious relationship if the "proper usage of finances" will be an issue...
For me, you come out of your mouth like that, thats a dealbreaker for me...
Most men have a desire to feel needed by their woman in relationships. Dating a woman that makes more money than you and uses that to negotiate power or disrespect you is huge flag to me. Some women purposely date down for that very reason. And 10 times out of 10 there is a man or patriarchal structure outside the home she's working for or bowing down to to earn her money. I dont date women for financial gain so i care more about their values, cooperation level, femininity, etc. then their salary.
The women I know that are breadwinners are big time control freaks. By dating down, they know the guy will not have much say so in financial decisions. It also opens the door for shit talking to the highest order.
That’s why some career women have a difficult time dating, especially if they have been in control of their life and living without much help of a man. They don’t want to have to risk being with a guy they feel like they would have to take care of. Which is generally the mentality when the woman make more money. Seems to be a control thing and the man (if raises traditionally) will have a hard time excepting this.
As society evolves, the gap between men and women when it comes to roles is closing in to the point it may not even be such a thing as a role in the future.
IMO, it’s best to grow with the woman financially instead of coming into a relationship where it’s already established. A woman could also grow to become the breadwinner within the relation years after marriage. That could also change the dynamic as well.
A career woman does not have the time to be that and a tradional housewife. That’s a lot to put on anyone’s plate.
Sex is definitely a weapon and will always be as long as these simps are able to be taken advantage of.
And they always will be because of the nature of sex. Every dude doesn’t know the game starting out. So Ls are going to happen to simps. Shit, most guys are simps when they first start out. The experience over time keeps them simpish or changes them to play the game smarter or more cautious.
Nor do they adapt to the change of their partner overtime. People actually think their partner is suppose to be the same as they first met, which is silly as fuck to believe.
I agree with all your post except your final statement. I think a lot of women are playing themselves jumping on the "rugged individualist" train. Black men attempted that in the 80s and 90s but it wasnt sustaining. All it did was produce a lot of coonery and fractured the community. Now black men are largely ignored by society, corporate america, and our community so some of the doors that were open for us in those eras are long gone today.
Women today are more dependent on the system than ever before to supplement having a man in their home. Over the next 20 years watch as that very system rolls back the safety nets to "rogue" women and pushes them out of the cities into suburbs. Right now women are comfortable economically being alone and refusing traditional roles so that is what pushed. But once men outside of our community stop hiring them or sponsoring their lifestyles (which is now starting) its a wrap. They already are physically whooping they ass in the street and in hair weave shops. This shit is cyclical. Right now non traditional HOES, corporate THOTs, and ratchets are winning but classy women, virtuous women with traditional values will make a comeback.
I've dropped vids on here in the past about MGTOW and dudes clowned it as saying the guys that think this way are gay. When actually it's dudes waking up to the nosenses of today's relationships.
I'm married, and what we generally were called as being a gentleman in a relationshit, today's woman uses it against men to use them. Not just for financial gain but in a relationship just to use men to do the same menial tasks in the home.
What women don't realize is the more and more a man does in the home and she doesn't, then what is her purpose of being around. I am not saying "barefoot and pregnant" but some women get so caught up in being "independent" and following certain figures in the media that they displace that what's real from a facade.
My mentality has been MGTOW for some time and I just don't tolerate the BS, yet I still do some things just because I am a good person period just don't think it's reciprocated. Used to be, but youtube, reality TV nonsense, and other factors have changed the person my wife used to be, sadly. But it is what it is.
I tolerate her BS. Because I'm not a believer in divorce or to quickly end something that would destroy many other lives than our own. But at the same time I know a relationshit is work and I'm sure I'm not Mr Perfect either.
But I see her as better than alot of the chameleon chicks out there today. And most women my age are pretty much damaged goods or not worth having a relationshit with if they haven't been married or in a long term relationship for all this time.
I'm married, and what we generally were called as being a gentleman in a relationshit, today's woman uses it against men to use them. Not just for financial gain but in a relationship just to use men to do the same menial tasks in the home.
What women don't realize is the more and more a man does in the home and she doesn't, then what is her purpose of being around. I am not saying "barefoot and pregnant" but some women get so caught up in being "independent" and following certain figures in the media that they displace that what's real from a facade.
My mentality has been MGTOW for some time and I just don't tolerate the BS, yet I still do some things just because I am a good person period just don't think it's reciprocated. Used to be, but youtube, reality TV nonsense, and other factors have changed the person my wife used to be, sadly. But it is what it is.
I tolerate her BS. Because I'm not a believer in divorce or to quickly end something that would destroy many other lives than our own. But at the same time I know a relationshit is work and I'm sure I'm not Mr Perfect either.
But I see her as better than alot of the chameleon chicks out there today. And most women my age are pretty much damaged goods or not worth having a relationshit with if they haven't been married or in a long term relationship for all this time.
I've had the complete opposite experience, but then again, we both started with very little and built up from there. If a person, male or female, come into a new relationship as the financial alpha dog, I can imagine that there'd be some control freak issues.
Ms sneed cakes way more than I do, she’s never thrown it in my face.
Chics just raised different. Starts with us being around as fathers.
Teach her to respect that man if he respects her, make him feel like a king even if his doe takes hits. Lift him up
And he’ll never let you go. Always gonna be there for the fam
Man ms sneed been my rock on my depression battle, and she’s got good fam. I’m treated like a son
I think in these discussions its important to separate those that are career oriented versus those that live off a system. I guess being an educator, my perspective is skewed towards those that are trying to improve their situations.
It seems that were are in a THOT era where that behavior is glorified. I'm not sure how this will transition over because there is still a responsibility of the Black man to reject this behavior as well. I'm not sure how WE are doing on that end. I think both exist the same way.
Yeah, I had mentioned in a previous post that it's different when growing together. Common values are shared. So there is no need for her to protect her progress and there is no need for you to protect your ego. This is the type of relationship I like to believe my wife and I share.
It's just many of the women that are career oriented (that I have met, not meant as a general statement) and not married have difficult times securing a man without there being some type of control freak issues.
You seem to have a great partnership with your wife and that yall hold each other down through thick and thin.
My wife hold me down as well, but I am the breadwinner of the house and if the roles were reversed Id still be cool because she was with me when I was at my lowest.
I wouldn't have got a PhD if she didn't start calling me doctor not long after we have met.
Compatibility.
Cut and dry just like that
Cut and dry just like that
It’s the change that neither the man or woman can predict within a relationship. It’s impossible to. In order for a person to remain stable, they would have to experience little life changing events. And because I believe no human on this planet doesn’t go through life without some type of suffering, then that change is inevitable. That change could also have been suppressed until something triggered it.
My approach is that I can’t predict human behavior. And the more I study humans, the less I know about them. If my wife’s mother die, she will change. How she changes, is yet to be determined. Same with me.
Many times in relationships, we fail to see the other’s perspective because we can become selfishly entrapped in our own feelings that it keeps us blind. I don’t believe in fairness even though I practice it in hopes my wife can see it. I don’t believe in a right or wrong even though I practice to live within the confinement of society. People in relationships are not thinking about that and much of it relies on perspective based on each other’s life experience. When I look at my relationship, I know that we are together but we are also experiencing the same thing differently, so I can’t go about her knowing my side of things if I really don’t know her side of things. And if I try to understand, I could barely know the feeling she may get from it because I’m not her and vice verse.
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You a wise dude
Its so difficult for humans to separate their experience versus the rest of the world. Their experience becomes the truth for them. Then it’s generalized.
I respect this brother's sincerity but he's a caveman. Gender roles are antiquated. There's a whole lot more that will have to be adjusted if you just want to keep women barefoot and pregnant. His analogy of a relationship and a business was good. He just needs to understand that when it comes to building, diversity and cross training always wins. Yes the man can be up front on the register while the woman is in the kitchen but I guarantee the team that has a man and woman that know both the register and the kitchen will be stronger and more successful.
This IMO is major because every day we live life changes us. It may not be a major event, the change can be as subtle as gray hairs, or major events like politics, job, war or death. But most people never recognize changes in their mates when they occur. Hell mates change once they marry.
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A person has to be willing to look at themselves (flaws and all). And be able to communicate it.
I think that is so difficult to do. At least for me it is. My wife communicates that well about herself.
I get this at times that I don't communicate my feelings. Well I'm an only child and at my age there's little chance I can change. I'm used to resolving my own problems and dealing with my emotions on my own. Is that a fault or is that me being me?
What I learned about myself if that I can change some of it, but I’ll never be 100% they way she wants me to be. And same for her. I don’t think youre ever to old to change something, it just probably will not be natural to you, so you’ll retreat back to natural behaviors when stressed.
I’m use to resolving things on my own as well, but my wife also likes to feel needed. So I have to give her that aspect even if I don’t really want to.