You a faggit
Contemplating suicide
- Thread starter dinka64
- Start date
Love how we showing support for a brother
Start traveling. You better get negative people out of your live. I don’t care if they’re relatives. Relatives can be your worst enemies. Getting negative energy out is a must. I’m cautious now who I be around. Better get some new people around you. Leave your area if needed.
Without the thought, how would you know to be upset about it? Think about it.
Ironic update. Been in the VA hospital since Friday awaiting a heart stress test due to chest pains. all test so far are good but the stress test will tell all. Keppra Meds had me wanting to Kill myself, now I am scrambling because I have so much left to do/fix. Grand kids oldest 18 youngest is 5 (I think its 12 of them)are all falling the fuck out worried. I sent a group text to all the kids the ex wife, and the Baby mama. (The wife and I split up for 4 years) I have only spoken to my ex, baby mama and three daughters. Out of my children the youngest daughter started texting me this morning so I called HER. The wife is down due to health issues. feels like an exodus. getting rid of the old fucked up so the new can have a chance at life without our tainted view. Any way Love me some BGOL. You Brothers Stay strong, Monitor your health. Stay up on your PSA (prostate info) A1C (diabetes info) somebody put a checklist of things we NEED to monitor to keep a jump on our health and post it. My 30 year wedding anniversary is today.
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Looks like you're heading in the right direction brother! Never hesitate to lay it all out on the board if you ever feel this way again. You know we all got you!
Glad to hear you figured what was causing those feelings and are in a much better place. Stay up brother!
Glad you back!!
Crazy how fuckin SUICIDAL thoughts is literally a side effect
of man made medication. and thats NOT by chance if you asking me..
its a lowkey way of ridding society of "the useless eater" a term
coined by the parasitic elites
Ill never be a medication guy... but thats just me,
I do much better with making FOOD my medicine...
First of all, Happy Anniversary
Secondly, I told you, tomorrow has the probability for possibilities.
I was feeling like shit. Broke as fuck living in a house I couldn't afford to fucking live in but not wanting to move because I don't want to fucking pack (I'm serious)
I went through Trajector Medical to get my disability rating from the VA increased from 10% ($140) to 70% ($1530) Then on my own I put in a supplemental claim for PTSD (they rated me 70% which pushed my 70% to 90% with their bullshit math) now I'm at 90% ($2000) with 4 more supplemental claims to go to get the full 100% ($3400)
With the $2000 I can pay my mortgage and pay down my debt and now I can breathe when I add in the money I make from my government job.
I went from feeling like I wanted to punch my own ticket (but not doing it because I was scared I'd miss and fuck up my life more) to actually feeling positive about the day when I wake up.
I still battle with depression, but besides that I feel good. If you need help improving your disability rating, hit me up bro. I'll put you on to the people who help me out. Sometimes a little bit of extra money can give you the breathing room you need for your life and your world.
GREAT example of taking on issues with a clear mind.
MOST SHIT can be squashed if we approach it right!
Good to see you better too, @dinka64 .
Man I'm serious. So many people think temporary problems are permanent. I don't want to speculate it exactly, but I would argue that half of the people who have committed suicide were for problems that would have been gone or severely dissipated in a year or less
GREAT example of taking on issues with a clear mind.
MOST SHIT can be squashed if we approach it right!
Good to see you better too, @dinka64 .
Tomorrow has the PROBABILITY for Possibilities.
I should put that shit on a t-shirt
Thank you. I have a young lawyer cat working on mine. I went from 70% to 90% in 3 months with that same shitty math they use. I was at 70% and they gave me 70% for mood disorder due to pain and a 10% increase on my back issues. that equaled 90%
I am waiting on a ruling on both my knees and scars to get to 100%. they hope you die before giving you 100%
Take it one day at a time dude. You have so much to live for even if you don't see it right now. We're with you buddy.
Your not alone
In a bruh love kinda wayTake it one day at a time dude. You have so much to live for even if you don't see it right now. We're with you buddy.
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Hurdle Health is now Backpack Healthcare
In line with Hurdle Health's mission, Backpack Healthcare provides accessible, inclusive and comprehensive mental healthcare for the whole family.
www.hurdle.health
Black Mental Health Organization
Looks like you're heading in the right direction brother! Never hesitate to lay it all out on the board if you ever feel this way again. You know we all got you!
100% well said.
There are hundreds, if not thousands, of people checking in on every thread here on the board. This equates to plenty of potential feedback & viewpoints. Best fucking forum on the internet (BGOL). Keep your head up & thanks for the update @dinka64
Stay strong.
Blessings. Truly. I appreciate you. Prayers are with you. That’s no bullshit. Your confidence in your BGOL fam is inspiring. We all fucked up in more ways than a few. Yet, any of us who been here for 15-20+ years knows the board survives and thrives on Love. Stay up. Blessed to hear the update. And best believe I will keep pushing myself because it’s a lot of shit I too am putting everything I got into healing. 30 years is amazing, Bruh. Congratulations and know that I believe your best years are still ahead of you.
Last photographed public appearance Dec 5th
Last photographed public appearance Dec 5th
Wait....tWitch! Aww man, wtf. RIP
Last photographed public appearance Dec 5th
This is shocking. I wondered about him being so deeply in Ellen's shadow, and where he would land after she left her show, but just wow. Really hate hearing this.
God-Of-War-420
Mr. Pool
The holidays can be tough on a lot of us, hope OP and the rest of the bgol fam are doing well on this Christmas day. For those feeling down you're not alone, don't give up.
Never quit. Never give up. We are people who have experienced intense pain for hundreds of years. It makes us strong and capable of withstanding pretty much anything. That being said, you don’t have to do it alone and you don’t have to suffer silently. The world is NOT better without a black man in it. Seek help and believe in healing. Merry Christmas and happy holidays to the board fam.
its been said before and i will say it again BGOL is more than a porn board and i am glad to have stumbled upon this place over 20 years ago. As men we try to be the rock for everyone at the risk of our own sanity thats why this place is so valuable many of us wont reach out to others face to face to talk about our shit because we may feel its a sign of weakness but we really need to reevaluate this because talking with someone can possibly mean saving your life , we really need to start checking in on our people outside of here and letting them know we are there for them. We need to understand we are in fact human and not the supermen we want the world to think we are. Blessibgs to you brothas and Merry Christmas family.
folks...keep your heads up...it does get better....the sun always comes up after a dark night. festivity time is usually rough on some people. check up on your folks, invited them over if you can...
Well said, everyone.
My dad's been in AA since the mid-90s and been able to maintain his sobriety.
He's noted having bouts of depression here and there over the years, but didn't fall back to drinking ... as it wouldn't help him any. He never met his grandpa on his dad's side, as he took his own life back in the late-30s or early-40s (left behind a wife & 11 children).
That said, he's attended AA on a weekly basis since 1996 up until early-2020 (pre-COVID). He hasn't gotten together with that group for the weekly meeting since COVID interrupted everything, but has always maintained contact with everyone. Developed some good friendships with people ... sponsoring and such in the years prior.
He's always been old-school and during the pandemic his big thing was "wellness checks" on friends and family. Especially some of the older people he knows that live alone. Just calling them up to see how things are going. Donating stuff to them (i.e. - old clothes, books, DVDs). Helped a few people with home repairs when he was younger and more able-bodied with those tasks. Keeping up with regular emailing with people. Shit like that. He's done the same with older relatives too. Talked to him a few times this week and he noted calling his aunt and uncle the other morning. They're 90 and 85yo respectively (one in the States, the other in a different province). He does the same with us kids ... calling and "checking in". It's appreciated.
My dad's been in AA since the mid-90s and been able to maintain his sobriety.
He's noted having bouts of depression here and there over the years, but didn't fall back to drinking ... as it wouldn't help him any. He never met his grandpa on his dad's side, as he took his own life back in the late-30s or early-40s (left behind a wife & 11 children).
That said, he's attended AA on a weekly basis since 1996 up until early-2020 (pre-COVID). He hasn't gotten together with that group for the weekly meeting since COVID interrupted everything, but has always maintained contact with everyone. Developed some good friendships with people ... sponsoring and such in the years prior.
He's always been old-school and during the pandemic his big thing was "wellness checks" on friends and family. Especially some of the older people he knows that live alone. Just calling them up to see how things are going. Donating stuff to them (i.e. - old clothes, books, DVDs). Helped a few people with home repairs when he was younger and more able-bodied with those tasks. Keeping up with regular emailing with people. Shit like that. He's done the same with older relatives too. Talked to him a few times this week and he noted calling his aunt and uncle the other morning. They're 90 and 85yo respectively (one in the States, the other in a different province). He does the same with us kids ... calling and "checking in". It's appreciated.
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Shout out to your pops for doing that. That's good stuff and I know the holidays for people that may feel lonely this time of year or any time of year.. I've been trying to do this as well, just checking in to say hey with a few of my family members that I really didn't have a relationship with before the pandemic. For 2023, I'm hitting the road to go see my family and friends. I told my son that we're going to travel more. Life is too short man. People dropping dead left and right and you dont have to be "older" for this to happen either. I mean seriously though, I wouldn't mind doing a BGOL meet and Greet for real.
Agreed.
Thanks re: pops. That's probably one of his best character traits. Just seeing the big picture. He's lost a lot of friends, family and coworkers over the years. Natural causes, disease, accidents. He doesn't take anyone for granted.
Like you said ... life is too short. Especially when it isn't just the older folks these days.
Life isn't guaranteed.
That's great re: you and your son. I've roadtripped with my dad a number of times, and that was fun. He tends to "follow a schedule" quite a bit, but it's nice to have that bonding time shooting the shit, listening to music, etc. Seeing those relatives that don't live nearby. Roadtripped with my bro in 2010 (the whole westcoast) and have travelled with family in 2010, 2014, and 2017 - 2019. It's worth it. Those memories that stick with you.
A BGOL meet and greet would be interesting, lol. There would be plenty of networking. Fist fights, etc. Guaranteed that the meet & greet hashtag would be trending on Twitter & IG for several days.
Will Bullet be there with his wife? Asking for the Fam.
